Hi everyone. my name is Ms Mongoose. You may remember me from such films as ‘You, Me, and Sixty Cones of Yarn’, ‘Suddenly Last Woolshop’ and ‘Is that Alpaca or Are You Just Pleased to See Me?’
Well, today, I’m here to tell you the secret of my knitting productivity. You may have wanted to ask ‘Hey, MsMongoose, how do you get some much knitting done? I just saw you cast on that cardigan last week and now it’s the size of a couch!’
Well, the secret of my success is simple; I have a bag big enough to fit in a cone of yarn, and I commute for three hours every day, and I don’t care if strangers see me.
Now, you can buy my three-DVD set of ‘Success the Mongoose Way' for six easy instalments of $39.99.
Or just, you know, work really far away from where you live.